A Letter from Amanda Craft serving as Regional Liaison for Mexico and Guatemala
Fall 2014 - Being Vulnerable
Do I know how to be vulnerable, especially in my relationship with God? I was struck by this question from a friend’s thank-you note.
I was privileged to lead a Sunday school class at University Presbyterian Church in El Paso, Texas, on the reflection book, When Helping Hurts: The Small Group Experience. I was asked to lead the unit on “Seeing God at Work.” Looking through the book, I was excited by the challenge to think through how I’ve seen God at work and how I’ve seen God’s work obstructed by our humanness and brokenness.
We spent time thinking about how we relate to those we hope to help and why we give to them. We can give out of a place of shame, which comes from within. We can give because we think we have to. We can give because we think this will appease those asking. We can give because we think money is the solution. We can give because we feel sorry for those poor people. We can give out a place of brokenness.
-1_medium250.jpeg)
Presbiterial Transversal del Norte in the Queqchi Region of Guatemala. I visited with the Sinodica leadership for the welcome and installation event for the women's presbytery group.
In this scenario of giving, we belittle the other in the story. The giving is not about the positive change it can create in lives but more about what it means to our own. The giver is the one with the power and the receiver is at the giver’s whim. We are not giving because we believe that the recipients are doing work that should be celebrated, but because we think they cannot survive without us. It is a one-sided conversation based solely on the giver’s perspective.
But what happens when we allow the recipient the chance to share his or her story? What if they begin to tell you about how they are changing their community with their own resources? What if they say that they do not want you to feel bad for them? What if they want you to make an investment in work that’s already moving them to a better place? What if the protagonist in the story wasn’t the giver but was the receiver?
Flashback: Village of Bethenia, Alta Verapa, Guatemala, 2013… When I arrived at this particular community late one April night, I was shocked by what I saw. And this came even after living among extreme poverty for several years. As I entered the church building, it took a moment for my eyes to take everything in and my brain to register what was before me. The dirt floor, the clapboard walls, the single solitary light hanging from the ceiling, and the 100+ faces looking back at me came into focus. Then my eyes scanned more closely the children—their discolored hair, their damaged teeth, and their small stature. Then it hits me—they are suffering from malnutrition. I humbly leave the talking to the other women who were accompanying me. Once our worship service was concluded, I exited the building overwhelmed by what I had just seen. Not minutes later, the pastor of the church is asking me, and only me, to meet with a few women from the church. Mixed emotions scramble in my stomach, and I begin to feel inadequate for what I am about to face. As I enter the room, I see the women sitting there. They begin to share with me the problems facing their community, and I have no words or solutions that will ease the suffering caused by these problems. Then something comes to me. I pick up my phone and begin to talk with a few contacts I have with other community organizations located in this region to see what they might suggest. They agree to visit the community in the next week to talk through possibilities.
In a place of desperation and in tears, we take each other’s hands and begin to pray. We pray about the pain around us and how this community is suffering. We pray for the lives directly affected by the lack of clean water, lack of enough nutritious food, and the lack of access to land. We pray for those who are underemployed and underpaid. We pray for those who are not able to access adequate healthcare for their families. And then we pray for the leaders of several local and national organizations that have been contacted to help them. We pray for the sister from the United States (me) who was in their midst and made those contacts on their behalf. And finally we pray for the many blessings God offers this community.
I shared this story with the Sunday school class at University Presbyterian Church because I think it highlights so well that how we live out these relationships can shift how we live and honor each other. It was not about me fixing their problems, but I was a channel for how to help them find allies to assist them. These organizations were far better equipped to offer viable solutions that worked locally. God provided a connection and link to the larger family waiting to walk with others. This was an example of how if we are willing to hear each other, God’s work can occur and even shine.
In that Sunday school class I also offered stories that illustrated far less positive results. Stories that showed how givers bulldozed through the receivers, offering solutions to problems that communities did not even identify. With good and faithful intentions, the projects and programs initiated could not be sustained by the local community because they were not what they wanted in the first place. We often make mistakes in mission work.
The conversation went well and participants enjoyed the class. Many gave supportive evaluations of the class time. I was pleased I could be with them to facilitate this unit.
A few days later the pastor intern, Tim Gray, sent me a thank-you note for my time and energy. In the note he also thanked me for being vulnerable. And this is precisely what made me ponder the question I raised at the start of this newsletter: do I know how to be vulnerable, especially in my relationship with God?
This reflection caused me to think about that Sunday school class and a few lessons I failed to address with the participants. Our vulnerability is exactly what allows us to glimpse our brokenness. It is a gift that gives clarity to how our relationships with self, others, and God are broken and how they need our attention. I am always struck by a Guatemalan’s ability to stay faithful, and I am starting to realize that they are willing to be vulnerable to God.
In the United States we are taught to think about having answers or otherwise we are seen as failures. This kind of teaching happens early in our lives, and it is good for creating a sense of independence and the ability to have a voice to advocate on our behalf. However, this solution-based thinking limits us when relating to communities that have unique problems that beg for unique solutions. God created each of us in God’s image, calling us to be different and bring distinct and valid voices to the table. When we are not quiet and patient to allow those voices to come forth, we obstruct how God might be working through someone else. In trying to fix our brokenness, we are not asked to come to our relationships with all of the answers. God invites us into a relationship that gives us the opportunity to be freed from that need to always be “fixers” so that God may work through others. In our quiet learning about and from one another, we are actually affirming the other in this story, and we all know the beauty that occurs when this happens.
Mission work infects us because it gives us a space to be vulnerable with God and with others. We are touched by how others can be faithful through times of struggle, and we are touched when they want to share those struggles with us. And if I can allow myself to be vulnerable with God through these experiences, my relationship becomes more authentic, honest, and real. Out of that comes an ability to really see others and how God is working through them. Many often say they can actually feel the Holy Spirit moving when they are involved in a mission experience. God becomes real in a way we cannot often understand when we are in our own context. That is what inspires me and many others in mission service.
We are all a small part of this work, and it is when we can work together that we feel connected to the larger Christian family and are connected to the abundant love God wants to share in the world. Your part in this plan is essential and necessary, and I give thanks for each one of you. I invite you to consider using When Helping Hurts and the companion guide, When Helping Hurts: The Small Group Experience with your congregation to learn more about how to minister with and among others. And I invite you to contemplate continuing your generous and faithful financial and prayerful support for my family and me.
To give financially, please go to: https://www.presbyterianmission.org/donate/make-a-gift/gift-info/102/. And choose a link if you want to donate to a different cause. Our account is E200512 (or use the link below).
To provide other kind words of support:
Email: Amanda.craft@pcusa.org or amanda.craft06@gmail.comPhone: 502.599.2682
Please know that as we journey together we are working to right the broken relationships.
Amanda
The 2014 Presbyterian Mission Yearbook for Prayer & Study, p. 35
The 2015 Presbyterian Mission Yearbook for Prayer & Study, p. 44
Read more about Amanda Craft and Omar Chan's ministries
Write to Amanda Craft
Write to Omar Chan
Individuals: Give online to E200512 for Amanda Craft's and Omar Chan's sending and support
Congregations: Give to D507508 for Amanda Craft's and Omar Chan's sending and support
Churches are asked to send donations through your congregation’s normal receiving site (this is usually your presbytery).
Double Your Impact!
A group of committed donors has pledged to match all gifts sent by individuals for mission personnel support now through December 31, 2014, up to $137,480. This means your gift today will be matched by a gift to support mission personnel around the world, wherever the need is greatest. We invite you to take advantage of this wonderful opportunity to double the impact of your gift. Thank you!
