A letter from Mark Hare in Haiti
August 6, 2009
Dear Friend,
Mark and Jenny with Keila Rose soon after her birth on July 16, 2009.
Jenny and I would like to share with you all the good news of the birth of our daughter, Keila Rosa (KAI lu ROE su). Keila was born by cesarean section on July 16 at the Baptist Hospital in Managua, Nicaragua. I was present with Jenny in the surgery, holding her hand. Anesthetized, but still fully awake, the doctors had spread a towel so that Jenny could not see the procedure. I, on the other hand, seated to Jenny’s left, could gaze over the towel and glimpse certain aspects of what was going on. My toughest job was not to wince, since my purported role was to help keep Jenny calm. Because of, or in spite of my trembling presence, Jenny came through the procedure with flying colors. Heart rate, breathing rate and blood pressure were steady throughout, and Keila was officially born at 1:47 p.m., weighing over 8 pounds (3.8 kilograms) and measuring around 20 inches (49 centimeters). The doctors had barely begun to clean Keila off when she began letting the world know she was here now, present and very much to be accounted for.
Only three weeks have now gone by, but it seems like much longer. So much to learn in so short a time! Jenny has been reading a lot about caring for babies, but I haven’t. Still, the fact is that whatever you find in the books is good for babies in general, but is sorely lacking in explaining ours. In general, Keila seems to be pretty clear about what she needs and when she needs it and isn’t at all timid about letting us know. The options are pretty simple: “I’m hungry,” “I’m wet,” “I’ve pooped my diaper” or, “I want you to hang out with me,” but sometimes we get ourselves confused anyway. Bit by bit we’re getting it, Jenny way ahead, but me chugging along steadily, behind on the learning curve, but still in the game.
Norman and Modestina Bent meet Keila Rosa in Managua’s Baptist Hospital.
In terms of helping us with the learning and in the details of the daily work, we have an incredible support team here at Jenny’s family’s house in Managua. My mother-in-law, Modestina Bent, for example, is always ready to lend a hand, be it fixing meals for Jenny and me, caring for Keila when Jenny needs a break or helping us keep ahead of the diaper load. We’re using both disposable and cloth diapers, but all of the cloth diapers have to be washed by hand. My own rule for that game is I wash the ones with pee, I wash out and leave to soak the ones with more solid substances. Modestina also has a wealth of information and traditions to help keep us on the proper parenthood path.
In general, advice is rarely lacking. As a multicultural family, we are at the convergence of ideas and traditions from a number of times and places. Some of the ideas I find to be excellent — massages for Keila, for example, a tradition from Jenny’s Miskito heritage. Others I find frustrating. Some seem bizarre, but work. Did you know, for example, that wetting a tiny piece of paper with spit and sticking it to a baby’s forehead will eliminate hiccups? If the cultural traditions seem arbitrary, the “modern” or “scientific” ones are frequently just as bad. According to some folks, we should be feeding Keila every hour and a half; according to others, every three hours; yet others say we should feed her whenever she indicates she’s hungry. My strategy with everyone not an immediate member of the family is to listen intently, nod wisely and then ignore anything we’re not doing anyway. When Jenny and I have questions about some issue that Modestina can’t fully address, we are blessed by having a good pediatrician here in Nicaragua, several wise family members and two doctor friends with the experience and the patience to answer our doubts.
If the convergence of traditions is sometimes overwhelming here, when Jenny and I return to Haiti with Keila, we may find ourselves completely blown away. Haiti, like Nicaragua, is a country of deeply held beliefs, and babyhood is the focus of many of those there as well. Jenny and I will be back in Haiti at the end of October, after spending a month in the United States, visiting family and friends there and also participating in PC(USA)’s World Mission Challenge. Jenny and I are anxious about the difficulties of keeping Keila healthy in a country such as Haiti, where adequate medical services and appropriate medicines are not always easy to find, but I think we’re up to the challenge. After long months away from our jobs, we will also be grateful to be back with our friends and colleagues in MPP, Jenny working in the laboratory of MPP’s Integrated Health Center and me with my crew in MPP’s Road to Life Yard-Moringa project.
Please keep Jenny and Keila and me in your prayers, as we persist in working through these transitions. Give thanks with us for the support we’ve found among family and friends. And please continue to pray for the work of MPP, looking to the day when all families in Haiti will have the means to offer their children lives of purpose and dignity.
In Christ,
Mark, Jenny and Keila Rosa Hare
P.S. For more photos of Keila as well as of the work with MPP, please visit our two blog sites: Mark and Jenny MPP/PC(USA) blog and Hareamark’s blog.
The 2009 Mission Yearbook for Prayer & Study, p. 286
